one of the mornings where i wake up just before sunrise with no pants on wondering what happened last night. so i decide to sleep until almost noon instead of trying to remember. I just looked over at my nightstand and my memory returned. I can't wait for this strawberry cheesecake lubricant to finish because it smells funny and it dries out too quickly. i can't imagine this product went through adequate testing before it ended up on shelves, considering how fast it wears off. and now it's at the bulbous part of the bottle so it will take longer to reach the bottom of the pump.
don't go to stores. order online-- save money and yourself from the awkward situation of seeing your roommate on the way to Good Vibrations when he decides to tag along and cause any consideration of back door action to be quite uncomfortable.
so if you wonder what is keeping me occupied for the next week or so, don't bother to call, i'll be having crazy animal monkey sex three times a day for the sake of being rid of this garbage.